Want Feedback?

Most conversations, articles and training regarding feedback is focused on giving leaders, managers and supervisors more tools and approaches for offering feedback more effectively. This is very important information, and these are skills that can help you be significantly more effective in developing others.

But it's only half the story.

Because you can do everything “right” in delivering feedback, but if it isn't heard, welcomed or valued by the other person, your technique is of little value. This article talks about the other half of the feedback equation: receiving feedback successfully.

As a coach or leader you can share these ideas with those you give feedback to, with the goal of making the feedback you give them more effective. But, this article is really written for all of us - because we all need feedback for our ongoing growth and improvement. Take your coaching hat off now and consider these ideas as a part of your personal development plan. Besides, once you've practiced them for yourself, you'll be in a better position to share them with others!

Ways to Receive Better Feedback

• Ask for it. Perhaps this should go without saying, but we all need the reminder. People often talk to me about wanting more feedback on their work, a specific project, or a situation. They will lament me that they didn't get any feedback or the feedback they got was insufficient. My first question is always, “did you ask for feedback?” The blank stare I typically receive tells the story. The lesson? If you want feedback you have to ask for it! While it is often best to ask for feedback before the situation, so the other person can watch for and observe in a way that allows them to prepare for their comments, asking at any time is a great strategy for getting more feedback.

• Value it. How do you feel when you give someone feedback and they don't seem to care about it or don't seem to give it much weight? Are you as likely to willingly give them feedback in the future or to work to make that feedback as effective as it could be? Probably not! If you want more (and better) feedback, you must value it which includes (among other things) thanking the person for provided us with the input for their help.

• Listen to it. Getting the feedback isn't enough, you must hear it! Listen with your ears to what is being said, so you hear the words. But listen too with your eyes and your heart. Try to understand what isn't being said as well. Remember that giving feedback isn't always easy, and the person sharing ideas (positive or negative) with you might not be 100% comfortable, or very experienced in, doing it. For you to get the most value from the feedback, you must listen closely and actively - asking clarifying questions and for additional details and insights.

• Be open to it. Being open to feedback is easy when you agree with or have already thought of the ideas being shared. But some feedback comes as a surprise. It is especially important in those instances to be open to it. If you value it, and really listen, it will make it easier to be open. It's important to recognize that there will sometimes be barriers in your mind. When others sense those barriers, you are making it less likely that they will want to share future feedback with you. Be open and you will get more feedback in the future (and you'll make better use of the feedback you are currently receiving!).

• Depersonalize it. The single biggest barrier to receiving feedback is defensiveness. And when you get defensive, it is usually because you are taking the feedback personally. I'm sure you have received feedback from someone when you felt like it was about you personally and not your behavior. Regardless of how someone intended the message, you can - with practice - decouple the feedback from you personally and keep it focused on your behavior. When it is about your behavior and not about you as a person, it is easier to drop your defenses and hear, and be open to, the feedback. Depending on the situation and the nature of the feedback, this depersonalization may not happen instantly, but overtime you can become more effective at translating the feedback into behavioral comments rather than interpreting them as personal in nature.

• Use it. Will you agree with - and take action on - every piece of feedback you receive? Probably not. And that's OK. On the other hand, even if you do the first five ideas well but never take any action to change, you not only aren't using the feedback to improve, but you're telling others (through your actions) that you don't really want or need any feedback.

As you read through these six ideas you hopefully see a common thread. Each of these ideas will help you get more or better feedback - and some do both! When you recognize the value feedback can have in improving your results you know it's too important to leave to chance. Use these six ideas and you will find yourself with more input and ideas to propel you to greater performance and results.

Potential Pointer: Feedback is a powerful tool for personal development, too powerful to leave up to others. If you want more and better feedback, you need to take responsibility for making that happen.


Kevin Eikenberry is a leadership expert and the Chief Potential Officer of The Kevin Eikenberry Group, a learning consulting company that helps Clients reach their potential through a variety of training, consulting and speaking services. You can learn more about him and a special offer on his newest book, Remarkable Leadership: Unleashing Your Leadership Potential One Skill at http://RemarkableLeadershipBook.com/bonuses.asp

The Key to Expert Performance

In a knowledge-driven economy, chances are greater than ever that the value you offer comes from making use of expertise. Conventional wisdom will tell you that you get the best from your expertise by deeper learning your field, by keeping up with new developments and understanding the nuances and intricacies of your domain – in short, investing in knowing more.

However, I believe using knowing more as your primary strategy for increasing the value of your expertise will likely leave you missing the boat – big time.

In the way knowing is not the same as doing, expertise is not the same as expert performance, i.e. actions in your domain of expertise that are considered to be best-in-class.

Conventional Wisdom tells us natural talent is what drives top performance. Modern research challenges this notion. K. Anders Ericsson, co-editor and contributor to the Cambridge Handbook of Expertise and Expert Performance, notes the common factor of expert performance in almost every domain researched is “deliberate practice” – ongoing practice and repetition shaped by active feedback. For example, there are many talented golfers in the world. It’s feedback driven practice that makes Tiger Woods a consistent champion.

Raw talent can certainly provide motivation and acceleration to feedback-driven practice, but it is the practice that creates the performance. In most domains, people with average talent can achieve expert-level performance by diligently exercising best practices based on ongoing feedback. Kenneth Blanchard hit the nail on the head when he said, “Feedback is the Breakfast of Champions.”

Top performing professionals seek feedback from clients and colleagues. Top performing businesses seek feedback from customers and employees. In all cases, a performance edge is obtained through diligently acquiring feedback, and even more diligently using it to guide performance improvement.

In the realm of leadership and management, executives who want to be top of their game use coaches or 360 reviews to garner feedback, both within and outside of their organization’s formal performance system. Where organizations often go wrong with these tools is using them primarily to shore up weaknesses rather than to accelerate performance of existing strengths and expertise.

Questions for leadership insight: What systematic feedback are you providing for yourself and other leaders in your organization? Are you using feedback to develop and polish best practices?
Are you seeking expert-level performance as much as expertise?

We can all agree that it is critically important factor to continue learning and keep up in your field. But knowing more in a field does not necessarily contribute to better performance or more value from expertise – for this you need diligent practice based on systematic feedback.


Guest writer Tom Stevens heads up Esquare Leadership.

Motivating Staff

One of the key challenges facing leaders at all levels is how best to motivate their staff. The reality is that each person is motivated (and de-motivated) by a different set of factors and the leader can exercise an influence over the vast majority of these. While this is a simple concept, identifying what the factors are for each individual and in turn, pressing the right buttons is not necessarily so easy.

Over the coming weeks I plan to pick the most common of these factors and explore how a leader can both identify which staff are affected by it and how to apply appropriate influence over each factor. This series will be called - Motivation Bite Size.

Before beginning that series, I’d briefly like to revisit what all staff need in order to deliver high levels of performance:

1. They need to know what is expected of them – i.e. clear goals, objectives, targets and standards.

2. They need to be capable of delivering what is expected of them.

3. They need support in helping to overcome any constraints or barriers that might prevent them achieving what is expected of them.

4. They need feedback on how they are delivering in relation to what is expected of them.

5. They need to be motivated.

Points 1-4 above all contribute to motivation. If people have clarity, capability, support and regular feedback, they are likely to be generally motivated. Similarly, a lack of any of these will likely contribute to a degree of de-motivation.

But there are also many other factors that contribute to motivation and these will be the focus of the series that follows. Be sure to tune in regularly and feel free to contribute to the discussion.


Simon Cooper is chief executive of the Experiential Learning Centre, author of the exciting new book, Brilliant Leader and architect of the Brilliant Leadership workshops.